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Bismillahirrahmanirrahiim...
It's been a long time, almost two months I've never written here. I was busy and hadn't found the pattern to get the new job done. I'm still learning it, so working on it is a bit hampered, considering all this is new to me.
I feel insecure. I felt so useless, and even I kept lowering myself even though the new people around me didn't say anything to me. They said that I was pretty confident when performing in front. Even when hanging out or meeting, I don't look like I'm down.
I know these are just my feelings. The satanic feelings keep whispering for me to give up. Yet this place is perfect. A theme that will make me grow, develop and even make my relationship with God closer.
Now I'm starting to stroll because I can't run. I simply try, give my best and enjoy all this process even though it is very annoying and tiring.
Don't people who are experts start from their incompetence which is then honed, and when they find failure, they get up and don't give up?
Common Ihat. You can do it! Don't underestimate yourself. Starting now, let's study hard, work hard, memorize forcefully, and don't forget to Allah for always praying and asking for Him everything. Your tahajjud, don't leave it.
Remember! Just Allah will enable you. Just Allah will help you. Just Allah will make easy your way.
It is just about time. I need to enjoy everything that comes to me. Pray to Allah, ask for Him and never get bored doing it.
Love,
Ihat